Books:

For bookish essays and ad hoc reviews, head to my (randomly updated) blog.

On Writing:

The Goblin Market: Writing in the gray area between sex and literature. (Plus, book recommendations!)

Sex in Flash Fiction: Speaker Notes

Sex in Flash Fiction: Sources & Resources

Let Me Know You: On Pseudonyms

Fiction as a Mirror, or Why I Won’t Write Responsibly

On Mining Yourself

Character Limits

Write What You (Don’t) Know

The Semantics of Sex

#DraftingIsHell

Sex & Culture:

Ownership: On Sexuality & Feminine Relations: Ohe reflexive sense of sexual competition women feel in relation to one another, and how damaging it can be.

Femme Fatales & Dames: A meditation on the roles women have, and continue to play, in TV and film.

Eva Green’s Breast: On the hypocrisy of the MPAA’s ruling against Eva Green’s image in marketing material for Sin City 2.

A Girl’s Guide to Growing Up: On raising a daughter in a sex positive way.

The Slap, or The Intimacy of Violence: On why violence can create its own highly charged sense of intimacy.

In Praise of Quiet: On introversion and the occasional need for quiet.

Debbie Does Dallas & Marries the Man of Her Dreams: On RomComs and Porn: On the unnecessary role that romantic comedies and porn often plays in a couple’s expectations and sexual (un)happiness.

On Slate’s Sexual History Calculator: An unapologetic rant against the notion that the number of partners you’ve had is actually relevant.

On Virginity, or A Case For Not Throwing It Away: In favor of waiting, though not for the reasons you make think.

In Praise of Feminine Things (A Rant): Loving lipstick, heels and lingerie doesn’t make you a tool of the patriarchy.

On Submission & Strong Women: My response to the assertion that women are biologically pre-disposed towards submission, just as dominance is the right of men.

All in One Person: Thoughts on Non-Monogamy

Little Monsters: On managing jealousy and insecurity in relationships.

How Do I Love Thee: On Comparing Relationships: On motherhood, relationships and the value of asking “how do you love me?” rather than “do you love me best?”